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How To Get Unstuck & Start Living Your Dream Life in 11 Transformative Steps

2020 reiterated that life is short, and the time is now…to start living your dream life.

After all, to live the dream takes a degree of fearlessness, hope and resilience – all badass traits 2020 proved we have (yes, even in the heartbreaking and painful moments when it didn’t feel that way).

Maybe last year left you deflated, uninspired and feeling incapable of accomplishing your goals. But just know, getting through 2020 alone took an incredible amount of inner strength. Though we have a way to go… it should still be acknowledged as a major milestone. (Well done!) 

Whether you desire to move abroad, start a new career, or launch a new business, today’s post is ridiculously useful for getting unstuck and fulfilling your dreams in 11 transformative steps. 

Ready to begin smashing your goals? 

Let’s get started! 

Step 1. Get Unstuck By Discovering What You Want

Do you actually know what you want? I ask this because we have been conditioned to complain, yet not knowing what we actually want. (By the way…it’s perfectly fine not to know what you want), this is where things get exciting! With introspection work, you can hone in on your dreams.

If you don’t yet journal, now is as good a time as any to begin. Journalling is an awesome tool for discovering who you are, as well as banishing any limiting beliefs you may have. Let your mind (and pen run), there is no right or right way. This is for you. Write down: 

  • What makes you goofy happy. 
  • What do you enjoy doing the most? 
  • What is the one thing in life you hope to accomplish? 
  • What fears are keeping you stuck?

For more journal prompts check out: 33 Journal Prompts for Self Discovery

Seeing your dreams and fears written down can be incredibly powerful. This process amplifies your voice and quietens that (noisy) inner critic. Knowing who you are and what you want is the first step in becoming unstuck and living your dream life.

Step 2. Save Up and Get Unstuck With a Bite-Sized Plan

Writing down your dreams fires up a conscious stream making accomplishing them…one step closer. I would love to say, that is it now, (but we all know dreams don’t just land in your lap). You got to work at it!

The good thing here is: The first step is complete, and now you know what you want! 

“Now what?,”  I hear you ask

Next…you create a plan! Not any old plan and certainly not a cliche “Where Do You See Yourself in 5 years?,” plan. No! Thanks to journaling, you know where you see yourself in 5 years. This next step is getting you from here to that vision.

Break down your dreams into small bite-sized (yet) achievable goals. If it is your dream to live in another country, for instance, perhaps you need to set up a savings plan. Or a date you’ll apply for your visa by (if needed). If you want a new career, maybe your goal will be to look for and apply for X jobs in a week. 

By breaking down your goals into small achievable chunks, each step in the process motivates you to take the next step and the next one and… until before you know it, you’re fearlessly living your dream.  

Step 3. Power Through “Off-Days” to Get Unstuck Consistently

Ready for some good news? 

Consistency is key to getting unstuck and living your dream life. 

And the not-so-good…

Being consistent isn’t always easy. 

Fortunately, you can implement a consistency-fail-proof-strategy by incorporating “off” days into any plan. Know, that there will be days when you will lose sight of your goal, lose patience with the process and yell

“To hell with it!”

Give yourself grace and accept that it’s all part of the journey. A necessary step to get you within reach of achieving your goal. Write your future self a message for days like these. Incorporate a motivational message into your plan to empower and inspire you in the moments you fall off.  

Step 4. Let Go, Get Unstuck and Let Your Dreams Flow

The mind is a powerful tool and through unconscious thought, can become our own worst enemy.

When you’ve suffered past hurts or a devastating blow sometimes, you can become stuck ruminating on the past. And, it can leave you paralysed with fear and unable to move on. 

Try not to be hard on yourself. In an odd way, your brain (out of fear) is doing what it think is best to prevent you from further hurts. However, this unconscious thought is unhelpful and keeping you from living your dream life.

Letting go, is something I too struggled with in the past. And I find it, along with neuroplasticity (stay with me) a fascinating topic. That said, this subject deserves a blog post on its own and I will link it here soon. What I will say…

in the moments you find yourself feeling anxious and overwhelmed

take a deep breath and calmly bring yourself back into the present.  Understand, there is nothing you can do about the past, and sometimes (most times) things are beyond our control.

I personally found “Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle a life-changing book for help controlling “ internal chatter”. Mindfulness meditation is also a wonderful way of learning to calm yourself down. 

Step 5. Get Unstuck Whilst You Earn A badge of Badass-ery!

After 2020, I’m sure I don’t need to tell you that: Life is unpredictable. 

Here’s the thing: No matter how much you plan, “life” can get in the way (this doesn’t mean procrastinate). Prepare for the unexpected. There will be some obstacles and spanners thrown in the works. But, don’t let that get in the way of living your dream life. 

Remember: It’s not how many times you fall, but how many times you get back up.

Failure doesn’t feel great, it’s icky and uncomfortable,  but…it’s how we grow. Failing is how we build up resilience, move beyond our comfort zone and gain a badge in badass-ery!. Try, (as hard as it is) to embrace failure.

Don’t be afraid to fail! 

When you become better at failing, you develop a sense of fearlessness, which helps you get out of your comfort zone, take risks, and reach your goals.

Step 6. Stand Up to Negative Nellies and Get Unstuck with Zero Tolerance 

Beware: negative Nellies, unguarded thoughts, highly critical people and energy vampires, avoid like the plague.

Negativity and dreams cannot thrive in the same environment. So, if you are serious about accomplishing your goals and living your dream life, you’ll need to declare a zero- negativity zone.

When you are stuck in life and trying to free yourself from the shackles of your comfort zone, The last thing you need is one so-called “harmless” comment to throw you off. 

Have a counter positive strategy to help you, should you accidentally come into contact with negative nellies or energy vampires. Or, if you’re feeling low and unable to quieten your inner critic.

There are few things you can do to strengthen yourself against negativity such as create a new playlist and rock it out. Or listen to an inspiring podcast. Anything! As long as it is empowering! 

Step 7. Get Unstuck through Good Vibes Only! 

Pay attention to how you feel when in the company of certain people. Energy doesn’t lie. Trust your intuition and surround yourself with people that leave you fired up, raring to go and just like you can take on the world because you can! 

When you’re in the company of the negative nellies and other energy vampires I described above, your self-esteem can take a kicking by their insidious and toxic poison.  (Trust me, I have met the kind).

When in their company, you will feel uninspired and your growth can become stunted. 

Protect your energy, and more importantly your dreams.  Only surround yourself with happy and positive people. People who want the best for you, mean you well  and are good for your soul – your tribe! 

Step 8. Get Unstuck and Start Believing in Yourself

To get unstuck and start living your dream life, you will need to believe in yourself. Forget what your mum, gran or the negative Nellie from way back when may have said. Nothing is stopping you. 

In the moments when your limiting beliefs get the better of you or your inner critic’s voice seems a little louder, use the power of visualisation. I realise this may sound a little woo-woo, but it’s visualisation (albeit reversed) preventing you from believing in yourself now!  

Contrary  to belief, the ability of not being able to believe in yourself is  picturing yourself NOT accomplishing your dream life. Try visualising yourself smashing every goal set out for yourself and living your dream life instead. 

Start shaping and moulding your behaviour to act as if you have already accomplished your dream.

If your desire to move abroad, start learning a new language or exploring undiscovered areas where you currently live, alone.

If you want to start a business, start reaching out to influencers and market leaders in the same field.

Step 9. Learn How To Get Unstuck and Celebrate More Wins!

Keep on top of your progress, whether through the aid of journalling, calendars or apps (whichever works best for you).

After all, how else will you be able to clap for yourself and celebrate those wins?

Talking of which…celebrating your successes are just as important as achieving them. Come up with a reward system!

Should you fail in achieving any of your bitesize goals…just know it’s okay to make mistakes. Use it as a learning opportunity. Keep a record of any missed goals and jot down the reasons for missing them.

Rather than hold it over your head, try and work out why you failed. Perhaps you need to reconfigure the size of your goal to prevent yourself from repeating the same things going forward.

Step 10. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others and Get Unstuck

We have all heard the Theodore Roosevelt quote: “Comparison is the thief of joy,” yet in this digital age, it’s hard advice to heed. 

Sometimes all it takes is an announcement of a baby, wedding or dazzling photos of an exotic trip for you to start comparing your entire reel with their highlights and asking yourself: 

“Seriously, what the heck am I doing with my life?” 

Here are a few ways to help you snap out of it when you start comparing yourself to others. 

  • Do a social media clearout, remove anyone /groups who are making you feel less than (Remember you can mute if you don’t want to unfollow) 
  • Count your #blessings (think on all the amazing things you have in your life) 
  • Use your feelings of inadequacy as a jump board to launch living your own dream life
  • Love where you are in your journey. Know everything that has happened (thus far) is to get you where you’re going 
  • Accept your flaws and imperfections – there will always be someone richer, smarter, prettier etc.
  • Choose to compare yourself with where you were yesterday 
  • Start living on your own timeline, know you don’t have to do anything by a certain age, date, time, month, year etc. 

Life is a journey, an adventure even. We all venture through it in different ways.

Considering there is no one else like you in the entire universe, it is wholly unfair to compare yourself with anyone other than you! 

Next time, you feel yourself negatively comparing yourself to others JUMP IN and remind yourself of everything you are doing to start living your dream life! 

Step 11. “I’ll Get Unstuck Tomorrow,” and More Excuses Reasons to Procrastinate!

When it comes to accomplishing your goals… raise your hand if you have said the following: 

“I’ll start tomorrow,”  Or

“When blah, blah happens…then I’ll be ready.” How about?

“I’m far too old for this” Or even

‘I’m too tired, or stressed or hungry (to start now)” 

🙋🏾‍♀️I am just as guilty of using them at some time or other. Nevertheless, I’m sure you don’t need me to spell out that these are

e x c u s e s. 

Moreover, if you continue to use them, you may find that you are unable to get unstuck and start living your dream life. Procrastination is inaction based on fear and failure to believe in yourself.

Arm yourself with your plan, and you will be unstoppable in the pursuit of your dreams.

“Never put off till tomorrow what you can do today,” with these procrastination-proof quotes 

Dale Carnegie

“One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon – instead of enjoying the roses blooming outside our windows today.”

Karen Lamb

“A year from now you may wish you had started today.”

Erica Jong

“We are so scared of being judged that we look for every excuse to procrastinate. ”

Max Brooks

“If you believe you can accomplish everything by “cramming” at the eleventh hour, by all means, don’t lift a finger now. But you may think twice about beginning to build your ark once it has already started raining.”

Janet Daile

“Someday is not a day of the week.”

Denis Waitley

“Time is an equal opportunity employer. Each human being has exactly the same number of hours and minutes every day. Rich people can’t buy more hours. Scientists can’t invent new minutes. And you can’t save time to spend it on another day. Even so, time is amazingly fair and forgiving. No matter how much time you’ve wasted in the past, you still have an entire tomorrow.”

Martin Luther

“How soon not now, becomes never.”

Hilary Mantel

“If you get stuck, get away from your desk. Take a walk, take a bath, go to sleep, make a pie, draw, listen to ­music, meditate, exercise; whatever you do, don’t just stick there scowling at the problem. But don’t make telephone calls or go to a party; if you do, other people’s words will pour in where your lost words should be. Open a gap for them, create a space. Be patient.”

Go for it! Living Your Dream Life Can Come True!

There you go, you have everything you need to start living your dream life! Believe in yourself and (with hard work), you can accomplish whatever you put your mind to. Ditch the negative nellies, grab your badge of badass-ry and go for it!

Dreams do come true <3